The rainbow in my cloud

I'm on leave today and had some free time after putting baby TAE to sleep. So, i scroll LJ friends' feed and came across a subbed video of Arashi. It's Aradio, something for the fanclub. Gosh, I'm grateful that community and the individual who subbed the video are kind enough to share it with fellow Arashian. To be very honest, these days I'm caught up with life and work and that leaves me with very little time to catch up with Arashi's stuff, but when I do have the time I will try to see what's I've been missing while I'm busy.

Arashi has been an important figure in my life, 20 years is a very lengthy period. Seeing them going on hiatus made me sad a little but to be fair they too have other things in life to pursue. I miss seeing all 5 together in one screen doing ridiculous stuff and most of the time doing inspiring things that lift up my weaken spirit.

Is there any way not to miss them so badly? I wish they'll be back soon and continue to put colors in my life.

  • Current Music
    Arashi - Still
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Cookie Monster

And so, I bought this soft toy for my baby. Being a 90's child, I grew up watching Sesame Street. One of the character that I love is Cookie Monster. Looking at the toy, feel like I'm watching Cookie Monster eating his cookies. hihihi.

Here is Cookie Monster eating his cookies:

And that ends my random post for today. :P
  • Current Music
    Lisa Ono - Bengawan Solo
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Missing the thing I love doing

These few days, I've been writing quite frequently on LJ. Feels like I need to let go of so many things. Anyway, I am missing Japan more than ever today. The last time I was there was in 2019. Had the plan to visit Japan during autumn 2020 but COVID-19 suddenly attacked the whole world and since then, I'm unable to go outside of my country. All I can do is reminisce and looked at my pictures in Japan or scrolling through pages that has Japan updates. Sounds pathethic but I miss travelling and specially missed being in Japan. Before this, I had my yearly trip to Japan, dunno when I am able to it again. Let's just pray this pandemic will end and things will return to normal.

I came across this video on Youtube which helps me heal this missing of Japan feelings. Shopping groceries is one of the things I love doing while I'm in Japan. Feels like I'm a local when I did that. I'd spent hours in the supermarket section just strolling freely, looking at things I'm not familiar with.

Let's just hope and pray, we will be able to travel freely again to wherever we feel like going.


Friends & Betrayal

Over the years, I didn't have that many friends. I am what you described as very selective. But as time goes on, I lose them one by one, not because they are dead but because I am no longer relevant to them. I do not know how to describe what I feel. Betrayal made me dumbfounded, and sadly it happened to me more than just once. And yes, like what people always say, the sad thing is betrayal almost always didn't come from your enemies but friends.

I am not a perfect friend but I do treasure my friends, I see them as my own siblings, my family. But i don't know what went wrong I am always treated like shit no matter how kind I was to them. Make sense, when people are saying bad things about you, they forget to tell other what good things you have done for them.

Today, I am hurt yet again. By someone I trusted so much, did the same things my other friends did to me. All my former friends ganged up against me. And this trusted friend who has been listening to me relentlessly has also gone to their side. Despite knowing all the bad things that had happened to me, and how badly I was treated. That person eventually became friend with those who treated me badly. When confronted, that person said.. it's not in her nature to not be friend with others. Ouch!

I am so mad, I do not know what to feel, hence I am here writing on an unknown blog which I know didn't have much reader and let go of all I had in this chest of mine. I wish and hope I could just yell at that person, but I choose not to. Not because I am afraid but because I do not want to make myself the bad person. I prayed so hard to Allah, so HE will grant me strength and helped me get over this. It is not my call to punish them. All I'm asking from Allah is for me to accept all this wholeheartedly and moved on. I know things happened for the best.

  • Current Music
    Sound of the fan
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Woahhh.. It has been a while! I'm still here.. in silent. But I still check out LJ from time to time. It's still the best place to get my Japanese related stuff. So what me made wanna write again? Nothing much. But a lot have changed. I am now a mother to a boy, Arashi is officially on hiatus and Eito is now only with 5 people. Made me think a lot about life. So many things can changed overnight. But we moved on anyway.

I am currently watching Tada's drama, Shitteru Wife. I got to admit, it has been a while since I watch J-drama or any Johnny's related drama. But if it's a drama with any of Arashi member or Eito I will sure check it out. I'm watching episode 7 now. It's quite a good one. I'm not sure if it's better or not from the korean version cuz I didn't watch the korean version. I guess that's why I am much more hooked on this drama because I do not know what's gonna happen nor do I have any expectations towards the drama. Watching it made me misses Tada. He is still the same Tada and even the theme song is quite good and I'm considering on buying it..

Anyway, enough of me blaberring. I'm just gonna share this picture which I think is the most important scene in the drama.

Your will shall decide your destiny.
Will you go through the same path or will you do it differently?


A MAS plane from KLIA bound for Beijing was found missing ever since Saturday morning, and til now no new updates are available. I'm still hoping, they're somehow safe, Insya-allah. So, please pray for the safety of MH370.


"Permudahkanlah segalanya buat mereka, Ya Allah."


These photos were everywhere this morning. And i had to wait til i got back from work to post this. Gosh, isn't these two cute? The main purpose of this entry is just to say that THESE TWO ARE SO SWEETLY ADORABLE! Can't wait for it! I can detect some kind of chemistry, which i hope won't disappoint me!


In Love <3